Gathering in the Head.

I was recently presented a entertaining list of reasons to be committed into an Insane asylum during the 1800's.. hunnids, hunnids. While I had to laugh, I also had to realize I would be eligible for life without parole, but hey, better than being burned at the stake. Right?

One reason on the list hit me in particular... (the rest were just humorous) as it stated "Gathering in the Head" As an addict, one might start thinking of gathering in the bathroom around an 8 ball of blow or getting fellated by a transexual hooker... or is that just what I think?

 In all seriousness, I tried to google the definition, and came up almost empty handed, but not empty headed. No one really seemed to no what it meant, but found some mumblings about evil spirits, demons, etc. It makes perfect sense to me as the God and the Devil are raging inside my head on a constant basis.

I have decided to come up with my own definition as it pertains to addicts / alcoholics.

Addikipedia definition : Gathering in the head - letting your fears, resentments, failures, regrets, etc gather in your fucking head till all you can hear is their constant noise, chatter, and hum & shrieks of their background noise.

Much like the annoying college age girls that live upstairs having a house party all night long while you are trying to sleep because you are a responsible adult and work a 9 ish to 5 ish job. Sometimes...

I don't know about you, but when I can't sleep due to outside induced noises I want to flip a switch and go on a violent rampage until that noise is dead... which may just land you in a insane asylum in this day and age. You wouldn't rent a room in your house to those loud, disrespectful bitches so why would you rent space to them in your own head? Let alone permit them to gather there?..

Ass to seat, pen to paper, head to heart.

I have been told, I have been learning, I have been open to the suggestion, that the only way to get rid of the gathering in my head is to get out those fears, resentments, regrets, failures, etc on paper, to address them properly, to drop the weight of the world I have been carrying around, trying to lessen the gravity of it all by floating in a cocktail or baggie of mind altering substances.

You would think I would be stronger from carrying this weight..

This is almost two years old that I recently found..

Shit's deep...


Let the un-gathering in my head begin.

In the mean time, take this self test for asylum commital....